Sunday, December 21, 2008

Golden Days

Cease the rushing,
there is nothing to complete...
and absorb the lessons
of your journey.
Be King or Queen for day...
Ending the Quest here
only takes you to
a threshold of another.

Be still; be here
in these short steps of Mastery.
Savor this time
to fully Become,
possess your worlds...
Savor your discoveries here,
these are Golden Days...

Thursday, December 18, 2008

Butterfly, Getting Free

Butterfly, getting free,
the relief
you experience
is not
your personal pardon,
but the release of others
from your rigid expectation...

Butterfly, getting free,
you will rise
to new heights
melting away
your worm-life.
Casting away
the heavy crystals
of resentment and restriction.

Butterfly, getting free,
feel the lightness
of your being,
as they are.
Free yourself
from this endless vigil...
the behavior of those around you.
See them
for who they are,
not what they
can or can't do

Thursday, December 4, 2008

Lovers Point, for P.B. Shelley

Lover's Point, for P.B. Shelley

and be with me
in your
supreme success.
The lull, the rhythmic roar of our faithful tide,
eternally wears away...
The shoreline stones,
obedient forever
to the phase of the moon,
the pull of the moon
on the tide...
How can you futilely
attempt to resist
Be rewarded,
with me.

Eternally Youthful Woman Denies She is Immortal, IV

Fire sparking
more Flames:
we learn to hold such inner Fire
Fire igniting
in every heart it touches,
until all the world's aflame.
So warm
such flame,
success not far behind;
be strong
be gentle.

alchemy, transformation;
circumstances changing,
magical, miraculous.
Only shifts
of perspective,
attitudes bringing clarity.
Fire harnessing, tempering,
used judiciously,
consuming every hope
and dream...

Eternally Youthful Woman Denies She is Immortal, III

The treasures of Heaven wait
inside the Mountain:
go deep into the wealth of wisdom
and good works from the past,
to charge yourself
with timeless strength.
Draw sustenance from such knowledge,
then you may cross to the farthest shores.
Others have traveled this path before you,
overcoming the same obstacles facing you,
making critical decisions at these same crossroads.

Study them, watch for them,
Gain inspiration and wisdom from them...
Learn from their mistakes;
Because all were Seekers,
Travelers, Explorers,
daring to map out a course you now follow.
Their words, their deeds will imbue you
with courage

to face what lies ahead.

Eternally Youthful Woman Denies She is Immortal, II

Dive into the deep waters of life...
If you can bring life to people;
be of constant encouragement,
one another.

Whole cities around you
will rise and fall,
but with YOU
at the center,
the energy moves
never drying to dust.

With YOU
at the center
the link is not broken.

The center is
common to us all,
The Collective Unconscious.
Others say "God within".
It's inside us,
the dream,
symbols, archetypes, emotions, instincts
we share with
every living being.

The lonely separateness we feel from others
is not because the center has dried up,
but because we loose the means
to reach its waters.
Timeless, inexhaustible
we can learn to nourish ourselves.

Each day is a challenge
to make ourselves pure again.

The clouds of Heaven rain help
upon those in need,
teaching us how we, too,
can move on
with no attachment to

the good we do.

To be sincere and earnest,
in spite of danger;
To not force the outcome,
but seek help when it's needed,
this is the way.

Daily, I restore this sword, my body,
pick it up, bring it into presence now.
I know this takes personal commitment,
Adversary would love to force one
into an angry display;
that would legitimize it's opposition...
Such rage would drag you down

to it's level.

bring yourself into presence,
take a public stand
against adversary, but refuse to participate
with it.
Without compromise,
show others the way to higher ground.

Eternally Youthful Woman Denies She is Immortal, I

Wednesday, November 5, 2008

Saturday, June 28, 2008

Rare Photo of Lewis Carroll and Alice Liddle, 1862

The Business of This

Much of the business ado
might have nothing to do
with a "lack" inside you;
but a belief that is setting you up,
feeling desperate and needy
and worked by the grasping
of those wanting and greedy.

Confused by an order
or ticking away
of anything paid by the buck,
is it ironic how letting-go
helps us to keep on, to stay...?
Then the forces do bring us our luck.

What must you check -
when it's ALL a fake

In the way of a child,
Just have compassion;
don't be hard on your body
don't give-in to depression.
Make your time worth your while...
Keep your face to Love's Light;
lift the wings of your spirit
from meaningless fight.

Ruslana Korshunova
July 2, 1987 - June 28, 2008
May you and all child-spirits like you find your way in the Love-Light of God.

Steal This

Rare is the person
who never professes
to be more than what they are.
Instead we get gussied-up in our dresses,
scouting about for a door...
Or a rung
to hang our star...
Full of pretense and airs,
confused from the start,
to humble our mind;
discombobbled regarding - who stole tarts?!
Never able
or willing to find...
Lying and dying
for what we "believe" in
betraying the core of our hearts...
Is this how we overcompensate?
Making judgments, conditions,
projecting our hate?
If we could stand back
and defy the resonance -
or change the flow of
our ongoing nonsense...

Would it help get us off
that victim-fence?

Wednesday, June 25, 2008

Will You Won't You This?

How do your friends come about -
by introduction or at random?
Would you dare to want to hang out
with a Mock Turtle or a Gryphon?
Isn't it strange
what makes a good time
is not always great in the long-run?
In fact, ever notice
how often it feels you're really not
having much fun?
When there's no respect
between you or me
it can affect
our integrity.
shape our hopes
and affect our dreams...
Others can take us
apart at the seams.
So, why force it
why coerce it
if there's no freedom in dance?
With every friendship we stand
that chance.
Just remember
if you enjoy being one
who does your own thing,
then do your own thing
'Til your interest is done!

Tuesday, June 24, 2008

Head-Off This!

Are you really happy or
does it matter all the same?
If your head's not in the right place
then who wants to know your name?
You can be full of info
you might be full of gripes!
There could be people talking
behind your back, the snipes.
So what, if cracks aren't funny
and those around you say you're old?
If your head's not in the right place
then all you value will be sold.
It doesn't matter what the King says
if the Queen can't hold her ground.
If your head's not in the right place
let's hope it's lost and found.

Friday, June 20, 2008

Game This

Tell them what they want to hear,
not what you think they should know...
Always act as if you care -
even if you wish to go.
Take interest in what they say,
and not in what they do.
Always wear the last fashion
with the best accessory and shoe.
Smoke with the those who smoke,
and drink with those who drink;
always laugh and smile, never letting on
you might be one who thinks.
Copy every friend you have
then tell them they are better.
Listen to whom they criticize
mimicking them to the letter.
Always ask and kow-tow,
offer presents, candy - a snack.
Then be sad and sorry
if there's anything you lack.
Cultivate your tantrum,
making sure they know your name;
this is the most consistent way
to go about this game!
You're the only one aware
if you can't keep your word,
no use pretending this is fair,
in fact, it's all absurd!
Just laugh and sing and dance a lot
- and never show your anger!
It's the best of ways to hold your spot
when the Queen gives you the finger!

Thursday, June 19, 2008

Queen of This

No need to sulk,
lay on your face
or give the ground a kiss!
I'll be all over the royal place -
coz I'm the Queen of This!

No need to play dead -
you won't soon have a head!
My only concern is
what about ME?
And yes, I have heard -
but it's ultimately my word!
And only my word that will be!

Now pick up your ass
before I harass
with demands that you cannot sort!
I say - Off With Your Head!
and - Off With His Head!
Coz I am the Queen of this Court!!

Tuesday, June 17, 2008

Painting This...

Painting This...
I paint around my innocence
so there won't be a random judge;
it takes some work on your part
to get into
my nucleus.

I'm sorry about my secret;
I live in shame and loss
of self-respect.
How terrible, and unforgiving!
I cannot give my gift.
One can't be free
if one is hiding,
one just exists
in wasting time.
I did my best
to cover this!
Being lovely
was my crime.

So you may cut me off -
if you wish, then call it dead.
I only did my best
but it was never right, this head.
One can't be free
if one is hiding,
one just exists
in wasting time.
I did my best
to cover this!
Being lovely
was my crime.

Sunday, June 15, 2008

Twinkle This

Welcome, welcome
to this party!
Welcome here
to this Mad Tea!
Bring with you
a drink, a poem
or ditty
or three!

"'Twinkle this...'
it's what he said,
pointing my gaze
as he molested.
His ignorant fingers
crept towards

my face."

"My mother banned me
from a place
I could not search
myself in grace...
So I came here
for psychic tea,
convinced my name
did not own me."

"In discomfort
I strain to rest
with each encounter
jealousy, pest...
Hanging on to
grandma's flowers
in the last, my childhood hours -

when Easter chocolates
made us wretch."

"My heart IS pain
a constant ache,
my fate - to manage
without a break.
It rules me,
dictating who I am...
In this place, what I call
nightmare wonderland."

"I DO enjoy
your butterflies
and changing chairs,
shining surprise...
My life becoming quiet, fair,
without approval
LOVE is here.
I bop between the worlds
and so,
it's like survival where
I must go.
From moment to moment -
from here to there -
like all mad riddlers
I shed my care

There are many people out there living with disabilities. People can be born with them, or acquire them in time; or they may have hereditary conditions that become something more. There are also many people who love to attribute all kinds of magickal characteristics to someone with a disability. In this way, the disabled are led to feel they are special, or can eventually refer to themselves as "shamans", having traveled through their "wounds".

What we don't see is how it is our condition sets us up for all kinds of scapegoating from the public. As we must work hard to integrate our dark-sides, we are often faced with the projections of others who cannot! It is not our responsibility to understand them, and it is not their responsibility to break us down in that way. This is where looking for approval can destroy the spirit of love. If we are people-pleasers, it is easy to lose the true essence of the gifts we have been given... For we exploit ourselves and others in the process, by establishing neediness and desperation as the ways to relate.

As we move into a time in America where we are bringing hundreds of injured soldiers home from war, society will have to be more realistic and compassionate in how we go about interacting with the disabled. Yes, it's true, we could have been great actors, great performers, musicians, painters, and writers, etcetera. There is only one problem: it is difficult to manage your life when you have a disability. Disability will often reduce one into becoming a liar, a thief, a con artist and a beggar. We live in a world of survival of the fittest, where weakness of any sort is looked down on. It's in this way disability begins to take over our lives and makes things unmanageable. It's in this way we are challenged to conduct ourselves with integrity.

Saturday, June 14, 2008

Grin for This

All your thoughts
will bring to you
exactly what you need,
everything to fit right up
in your proverbial tree.
It can be as simple as
one and two and three...
Just make up your mind,
and you too can be
a happy little kit-ty.

Kisses and loves
always make us glad
even if those we meet
are flipping-mad.
Just give it a vacation break,
smile for awhile, or try to be someone
who shares more than you take.

Do the best you can, so openly:
it's how we learn to trust -
with validation or a boundary,
or silence if we must!

You used to make me smile,
but years pass and fall away...
I hope you don't misunderstand
why I hide, invisibly?

Friday, June 13, 2008

Hang On To This

Have faith:
not everyone operates
in self-interest.
Sometimes the grunting and groaning
is just gas.
Friends can find a natural revival
if unique persons meet
beyond the need for survival.
I'm talking about individuation
where there's a likelihood
of graduation
to all-new levels of growing...
Not just eating and eating
as if in the shadow of a piglet.
No break-ups where little pigs
become unhinged
running back to the house to binge.

Hang on to that quiet part of you that knows,
the eternal child...
And talk to her, where ever she goes.
Learn how to coax her from within,
help her to help put your heart
on a happier spin.

Note regarding the illustrations of Alice by John Tenniel: As I collected images on the web, I noticed some old-fashioned colorized drawings of Alice were different from the ones printed in the traditional "Alice in Wonderland" and "Looking Glass" books! As you can see, the pen and ink drawing for the black and white prints show a younger Alice. She is portrayed as a little girl, with large eyes and a fluffy, gamine dress, probably 8 or 9 years old. Colorized Alice was done for some sort of collection of Alice Nursery Rhymes, by Carroll. This Alice wears a pleated yellow frock with a giant blue ribbon in her hair, very much the style of the later part of the century; and she looks as if she could be as old as 12 or 13 years. This just goes to show what a couple of geniuses Carroll and Tenniel were...! For perhaps it was their secret way of showing how, like them, we can all time-travel to Wonderland at any age?

Thursday, June 12, 2008

Sit On This

What would happen
if you stopped burning and blowing smoke?
Became less
of a worker-bee/performer,
a what-if-thinkin' pepper-shaker?
Must you always be outstanding,
killing yourself by their demanding?
Barely maiming everyone near you...
Getting through the work you do.

You might have more focus
If you stopped allowing another
to set the tone, like some
over-stuffed controlling mother.
Don't hang-in there for the soup
if getting out
is the best re-coup!
Just remember:
All invitations come a-knocking,
invading your brain, when you're not looking.

Their lives, consumed,
a not-so-private chaos,
their unmanageable air,
so filled, and so innocuous,
leaves you sitting there,
the speechless guest in an uneasy chair.
Reduced to crouching like some crazy, wild cat
which knows chaos
is where it's at...
They bring it with them and it never slows!
Whatever they do it just comes and goes -
24/7 - it comes and it goes!

Wednesday, June 11, 2008

Lewis Carroll (AKA Charles Dodgson) was adored by the children he photographed.

From the New York Times online 2 April, 1999:

But was Carroll a pedophile? As you walk through ''Reflections in a Looking Glass: A Lewis Carroll Centenary Exhibition,'' organized by the Harry Ransom Humanities Research Center at the University of Texas at Austin to mark his death in 1898 and now at the Equitable Gallery in Manhattan, the question seems oddly irrelevant. What is most startling, and attractive, in his portraits of girls is not what he saw in them but what they saw in him.

''Lewis Carroll . . . came to our country home to photograph the children,'' wrote Dymphna Ellis, one of the children Carroll photographed. She added: ''I feel sure I was a 'favorite.' He made every child that. He developed the photographs in our cellar . . . I remember the mess and the mystery . . . We cried when he went away . . . We were absolutely fearless with him. We felt he was one of us, and on our side against all the grown-ups.''

Dignify This; for David O'Kane, 4 June, 2008

David O'Kane, Self Portrait (as Lewis Carroll), digital photograph, 2004
printed by permission

Dignify this,
how a man would resort to machine
to assemble/express his Victorian dream...
For which there was no compromise -
Demanding contemporaries
avert their eyes.
When this is left - the life-lorn photograph -
Obscuring one heart
from his passionate path
of absolved reminiscences -
fixing instead, a loving, child-mind
far, far ahead of his time...
So that we, the children
could look back in space
and know the humanity there
in his face;
where we learn to perhaps
break down such walls
that harden inside us,
steadfast, and old.

for David O'Kane, 4 June, 2008

Wednesday, June 4, 2008

Who is This?

Who is this
that says the things
she doesn't mean
and does the things
she's doesn't believe?
Who is the person
who hides her heart?
Who never knows where
to begin or start,
living her life as if
under a 'shroom?
As if there's no space,
as if "there's no room"?
Somehow she believes
she's been placed in a freezer;
not knowing she's a trained and
possessed people-pleaser.
She's willing and bright,
yet not able to fly,
she keeps lid on her light,
too afraid to try.

Tuesday, June 3, 2008

Nibble This

My challenge is to take my pleasures
in the simplest things
without imbibing
what knocks me unconscious.
There was a time in life
when being unconscious was "hip";
thus I deserted friends
who couldn't "get with it".
Still, I had my fill of cons,
jokesters and fakers.
In many ways I paid for life
by being a heart-breaker.
Now I feed myself
with that which nurtures my soul,
having learned no one else
will comfort or keep me whole.
You see, they never understood
there was a little child inside.
She's what keeps me going
beyond tolerance and pride.

Monday, June 2, 2008

Chase This

Chase This

There is no logical order to this:
The only one responsible
for your own happiness
is you.
It would be nice if we could go through life
being validated for who we are;
we expect that from our parents,
look for it from our friends
and work for it with our colleagues.
Chase the inner-most elements of
your own self-respect
in spite of men, places and doctorates.
Let your heart be filled
with all things, people, and places
you love most.
Allow them to become your pathways
of study and celebration,
but never a means to end.

Sunday, June 1, 2008

Find This

Find This

We have to learn how to deal
with the different levels of chaos in our lives,
starting with ourselves.
It's a challenge to move forward
with your own chaos following
where ever you go.
It happens.
And it's not possible to prioritize
without making some sacrifice;
it's a delicate process of finding
what might let us in
to that gorgeous secret garden
we all yearn for.

Saturday, May 31, 2008

Dress This...

Some parents are negligent,
they don't mean to be. It might have something to do
with their own immaturity.
Is it no wonder
you'd be reduced to funky ribbons and tennies?
Thus begins a life
of dressing to please,
rebelling against parents and all authorities.

With great strides to attract a little sugar or spice
we go to some length to posture our lives,
modeling positions of naughty or nice...
Never once thinking how we give ourselves away.
We get forced on a mark
with no room to stray.
Please make a note of it!
What it does to your esteem,
if you can't move or stay together
long enough to keep it "clean"!

Friday, May 30, 2008

Dream This

Sometimes I dream this

never surprised at the characters I meet
who are also dreaming this.
Just be careful
if you get too close to this state.
The public loves to declare
you have disappeared, need medication or
there is a problem with addiction;
never truly guessing you might have done it to yourself
on purpose.

Instead, someone is called in to write a report or documentary,
making you look like more of a study.
Since no one ever truly listened
I suppose this is why we turn to dreaming.
Dreaming is a way to listen to yourself.
It's a "safe" way to contemplate doing-away with yourself.
I sometimes dream I am hanging myself
or throwing myself into traffic.
The more violent dreams you know, I've outgrown and put aside
(I am talking about the dreams of letting-blood).
Yes, you can outgrow these things!
Yet I'm amazed I made it this far!

The challenge is to keep my mind and my eyes open.
I was lucky to have teachers who taught me how
using the arts, painting, writing, poetry and music
are ways to give myself an excuse from violent ends.
But I worry about the girls who are missing,
some too young to know what happened,
they become victims of another's sordid dreams,
simply I'm sure, because nobody bothered to listen.

Thursday, May 29, 2008

Swim in This...

Swim in This...
It's bad enough
I've had people kicking my ass all my life;
I would have to pick up where they leave off.
I would start kicking my own ass, you know,
as I swim in this.

I sometimes forget
I should be more compassionate
especially for myself,
feel less sorry
for myself,
let go of the need to control.
I'm not perfect! Sometimes I'm wrong!
When you've spent your entire life in chaos
you find yourself having a helluva time
making decisions, standing up for yourself,
saying no... especially if you're afraid.
It's harder but easier to just keep kicking!
It's like a kind of traumatic-shock-syndrome.
It makes you dizzy with no orientation -
you just keep swimming 'round and around,
kicking your own ass
where others left off.
Some people learn to float.
Some are hangers-on and will take you down
using you to rest their hydrogenated fats on...
You are a buoy for their own lack of resistance.
Do you see so many people eking out that existence?
Going home alone every night?
Never being held, touched, caressed or hugged, even in marriage?
It is like they lost something.
So I find myself being single, doing the best I can, dammit!
At least I keep my head
above water!

Wednesday, May 28, 2008

Ponder This

Ponder this:
why must you take things so personally?
If you love me
will I, should I,
always do what you want?

I want to ask you, I
would ask you,
if I didn't understand.
I would want you to be able to do the same.
We both know, just between you and I?
It's all madness.
So if I go away?
I would like to come back to myself,
do my own activities...
I would be grateful to you
and like myself more. Then?
I would like to come back to YOU -
knowing I am someone
you love and care about.

Tuesday, May 27, 2008

Out-Grow This

Out-grow this: why set yourself up to be chattel? Hunting white rabbits,
girls and boys, letting yourselves be conned
by cunning mothers, and fool-hearty men?

It's not the way to grow or survive. It's a presumption
that once you are out of the house
experience helps you grow;
that's a lazy way to raise a child.

Experience only shows, everyone is performing.
Inside, they hate themselves, knowing they are capable of better, higher.
It is better to chase knowledge, information and books. Be wise.
It's higher to nurture your soul with the histories of time. Be fore-armed.
It's better and higher, to lift your own spirit through nature
than be locked-up indoors. Be stronger than this.

Monday, May 26, 2008

Realize This

I've got a big secret to tell you. You remember this horrible nightmare...? Some called it a fairy-tale? (They called it a fairy-tale, but for us, remember, it was real.)

That was their way of minimizing you. They wanted to stay in their denial. So it was easier to tell you your shamanic trances, your otherworldly journeys into yourself weren't real.
They will always urge you, that you must keep running to get to something more real.

Realize this: you can't keep running.

It's part of a people-pleasing game.

They say you MUST keep running!
You are not allowed to be anything but afraid.
What would happen if you stopped being afraid?

(You just might run into something interesting.

If you were to stop, you might disappear!!
You have to be in-touch with yourself,
have the courage enough
to know yourself inside and out,
good, bad, and ugly.

(Then, when you stop? You Will Still Be Here!)